Pick Me Up

The best guy friend came over and spent the night. I told him about how I was tired of dealing with food, tired of missing my best friend, tired of not eating because I just purge everything I eat anyways. He told me he's just here to hold my hand and help me along, he's not going to try to force me to eat. I fell asleep in his arms and he held me all night. It's so nice to just relax with someone that understands me.

I had the best flute lesson today with my professor. She noticed I lost weight too. She said I look thinner and happier. Well, one of those is right. I made so much progress. I'm finally at a point where lessons are guidance and not lectures. I'm beginning to make music on my own. If I can just push a little harder and make the connection to my soul more evident, I would be killer.

Recital in 17 days.

Unofficial Weight at 159.0 I can't go until Friday without knowing what I weigh. I do it like three times a day. We'll just call Friday that official weigh in. Ate a chicken salad sandwich and a bowl of cereal. Drinking fruit juice. Maybe some grapes later.

I need to push harder. I should be smaller than this. 159 is not good enough.

I think these photos are a little cheesy, but I wouldn't mind my body looking like this when I play: (taken from http://emilythomas.org/index.html)